What is a ‘live with’ agreement in a Child Arrangements Order?

19 March 2026

When a relationship breaks down, deciding where a child should live can be one of the most emotional and challenging issues for parents.

If an agreement cannot be reached amicably between parents, the court may need to step in and implement a Child Arrangements Order. This can include a ‘live with’ order and it is important you understand how this works.

Our Head of the Family Department, Stuart Daniel, explains the process and what a ‘live with’ order includes.

What is a ‘live with’ order?

A ‘live with’ order is part of a Child Arrangements Order and sets out where and who the child will live with.

A Child Arrangements Order does more than determine residence and can also specify:

• When and how a child spends time with the other parents
• Shared care agreements
• Details about handovers, holidays and special occasions
• Any conditions or restrictions needed to safeguard the child

A person named in a ‘live with’ order automatically has parental responsibility for the duration of the order, if they do not already have it.

This gives them the authority to make day-to-day decisions about the child’s upbringing.

However, there are certain limitations.

For example, a parent cannot change a child’s surname or take them abroad for more than one month without the consent of others who hold parental responsibility or permission from the court.

Who decides where a child lives?

If parents cannot agree on where a child should live, it is left to the court to decide.

The court’s main priority during the process is always the child’s welfare.

Under the Children Act 1989, a welfare checklist will be applied and this includes factors such as:

• The child’s wishes and feelings, depending on their age and understanding
• Each parent’s ability to meet the child’s needs
• The likely effect of any change in circumstances
• Any risk of harm

The court will start from the principle that a child benefits from the involvement of both parents, provided this does not place the child at risk of harm.

What are the types of ‘live with’ arrangements?

There are two main types of living arrangements that can be ordered.

Child lives with one parent (primary residence)

In most cases, a child lives in a primary home with one parent. The other parent will usually have defined contact arrangements, such as alternate weekends or midweek visits.

This may be appropriate where parents live far apart or where one parent has been the main caregiver.

Child lives with both parents (shared care)

A shared care arrangement allows the child to spend substantial time with both parents.

This does not have to mean a 50/50 split and can involve alternating weeks or a set weekly pattern.

Shared arrangements often work best where parents live close to each other and cooperate effectively.

How can we support your child arrangements?

We know that it is difficult to come to an agreement on who your child should live with and it is even harder when emotions are involved.

Our Family Law can help you understand your rights during this process and the options available to you.

We can assist with negotiating agreements and help prepare court applications and evidence for a Child Arrangements Order.

If you are struggling to agree on where your child should live, early legal advice can help reduce conflict and move towards a workable solution for you and your child.

For further advice or support with child arrangements, contact our Family Law team today.